Even without a full understanding of behavioural styles you can still make a few basic changes and have more success networking. Have you ever noticed how some people annoy you because they speak to quickly or too slowly. Maybe all the want to do is talk about fun and themselves and not about work. Maybe when you talk about business they start to get uncomfortable. What ever for some reason there is no connection between you and the person you are talking to.

By the way if you feel like this about them the chances are they feel similarly awkward. So how can we do something about it.

In a nut shell we are all different.

So what can you do?

Copy ( Mirror ) their speed of talking, their subject matter ( business or pleasure ), their tonality even the words they use. Their body language. one arm in pocket or arms crossed ( seasoned networks will know this is usally a sign of being uncomfortable) and yes MIRROR them. Poeple quite simply like people like them.

If they use visual words ” see what I mean” or Audio ” I hear what you are saying” Kinetic ” lets touch base ” try to copy their preferred representation system

It will all make you more easy to talk to. Given people like people like them. It will help you develop a relationship whether socially or in business

I am not sure whether to laugh or cry when I hear business owner say they can’t afford 497 aed ( that’s about $135) on learning new skills to build there business.

When you think that most people will happily spend that much on a night out , a meal or a box set of DVD’s.

I guess this is why so many businesses are struggling at the moment. “If you do what you have always done you will get what you always got”

Just 2 weeks ago I was in Dubai and through a friend met a young lady at a salsa party. It turns out this lady was from Marin county san francisco. Because I am intersted in salsa I asked about clubs there and places to go.

One week later I had just walked off stage in san francisco after doing my “Get the Buzz” speach. A lady in the audience asked me where she could dance salsa near petaluma, san francisco.

Now is it only me who finds it a bit odd. Someone from san francisco asking someone from Dubai in the UAE where to do something in their locality over 16 hours flight away.

The funny thing is I could tell her

The world is indeed a small place for those who are connected:)

I recently attended a course that I thought I would share with my network because it was so impactful for me in the following areas and I like to share these experiences:

1 My business
2 MY personal development

Business
For anyone in sales, the knowledge of NLP as a tool is of paramount importance, these skills could take your business to a completely different level. In dealing with staff relations, client service and sales generation. This is just in our normal practice let alone those wishing to use these skills for business/life coaching.

I would summarize my ROI ( Return on investment ) in the following areas.

1 Immediate impact on my business of 54,000aed as a result attending the course.
2 Meeting Incredible individuals who are now valued parts of my network
3 Skills I can now apply to my coaching, Professional speaking and sales ability that have already provided me with many intangibles
4 I managed to give 8 quality referrals to my network as a result
5 Deepen relationships with a number of people whom I have had the greatest respect for but never been able to spend enough time with.
6 I have also located and am building a new Referral Partner and strategic alliance as a result.

Personal Development
1 I have learnt to deal with some personal demons
2 I have deeper and more understanding relationship with the people closest to me
3 I can deal with unwanted thoughts and emotions and instead pull on positive powerful intentions and feelings

Oh and by the way I had an awesome time and got to Karate chop a board in half:)

see below for more details and links.

I highly recommend this course.if you are intersted the next in Dubai 24th – 27th February & 3rd – 5th March 2011
contact me or diretly to Carol Talbot carol@matrix-training.com

Checkout the last 3 minutes of my “Get the Buzz” presentation at Referral Institute Conference this summer. what a great crowd and I think they may remember me

I am sat here its 01.54 and I am putting the finishing touches to my presentation for my presentation tomorrow at Referral Institute conference 2011 on Referral marketing.

I am awake at this crazy hour because I am nervous and I keep wanting to make changes. I never loose the nerves and I think the more value I want to share the more nervous I get. We are have 240 business professionals confirmed attending and I am so excited to be here and help support the local community. I get to share a stage with other top names in the referral marketing industry such as the “Father of Modern” networking Dr Ivan Misner, Mike Macedonio and Dawn Lyons.

What I find rather odd /sad is that only 3 years ago I used to do anything to not do a presentation. As a BNI member I went a whole year without presenting my business to my piers. At the time I thought I was “clever” to get away with it. My goodness how deluded was I. Not only was I missing the opportunity to train my referral team. How could they ever really refer me unless they understood what I did and and what is a good referral. I also nearly lost the opportunity to do something I know do as a living and LOVE it.

Just shows we have to step out of our comfort zones and we might find something we love.

It’s tough these days. So many people check facebook or comment on their blogs as often as their phone or email, often more .

It is so tempting to post immediately to not miss a comment. Just beware of posting because once its out there its out there.

don’t drink and post:)

I remember when I was a child running around the school playground. It was pretty common for children who liked each other to send their best friends over to a girl or boy to gauge their interest in becoming a boyfriend or girlfriend.

Even at these early ages children naturally realise how much easier referrals are. In this case, getting someone else to do the asking for you rather than having to walk up and ask yourself

Especially effective was when the child doing the asking was their friend and yours.
When it is their friend and your friend then the chances they will promote you with more vigour are increased. Then what we have is a testimonial.

Testimonials from existing clients are an extremely powerful tool in word of mouth marketing.

Do you have a collection of testimonials you can give to new clients or even better than that , your trained networking partner can give your potential client during the referral process.

Ideas to make your testimonials more effective:

1 Train your referral partner how and when to use them
2 Why not target your testimonial towards the 3 most common objections you receive from potential clients!
3 Make sure the testimonial cover

• What your problem was before they employed your product or service
• What they discovered during
• What was the result, the ROI as a result of your product or service

4 In this modern age do you have video testimonials?
As an example check out this link
Testimonial example
5 offer the person giving the testimonial the opportunity to promote themselves in the testimonial . They will be more inclined to take the time to do one for you.

The power of social networking is undeniable. Twitter, facebook,linked in and their like are here to stay and they are connecting the world like never before.

Like anything they must be considered in moderation and there is a time and place.

The other day I was sat next someone in a training session learning how to increase our business by world of mouth marketing. I would estimate that during this period my friend must have spent a good 15 minutes of the 2 hour session on his blackberry Tweeting what was happening in the meeting.

Ask any women, and they will comment with a rye smile that men seem to able to only really handle one task at a time with full focus. Even though we will claim to be able to read a book and watch a film at the same time.

It seems odd to me that we would pay to be trained and learn from experts and then not listen to the Gems of information. Any one of which could drastically change our business. Instead my friend would rather tell those people who couldn’t be bothered to actually turn up what was going on!

Would it be more effective to send the tweet after the event and get full value from the moment?

What about those people who choose to sit there and sms throughout a training event is it not the same. Surely many clients could wait half an hour until the tea break.

What message are we sending to the trainer and to our colleagues. I am not bothered, not interested. I can’t handle my own time management.

Please read this. It is Peter Brays last BNI 60 seconds. The whole chapter choked up . Peter is, after many years returning home to Wales to retire

ALAS MY LAST 60 SECONDS by Peter Bray ( Biz Accounting Services )

It is with much regret that I stand here today
For I must tell you I am leaving to go away
To the land of my fathers green and cold
To be closer to family before I get old
It is with much regret that I say goodbye
Not able to stay with BNI
Leaving my friends will cause some pain
But I shall always remember our “Givers Gain”.
Through BNI we have learned to know
How to help each others business grow
Through hardship and strife we helped each other
And to have such friends is indeed an honour.
I would like thank our leadership team
Whose tireless efforts are not always seen
They have to keep us on a straight rail
And without their support the group would fail
Thanks to our chairman and man of steel
Who’s commitment to the cause might seem unreal
But members soon realise and get to know
With him at the helm the chapter will grow
So farewell you ladies so sweet and fair
And farewell to the boys who shouldn’t stare
Keep up the good work and do not stop
To get Rising Phoenix to the top.