Did Michael Jackson train for the Referral Institute?

The main skills to ensure success in Referral Marketing and networking are the following:

1 “Givers Gain”, the law of reciprocity. If I give you business and help you reach your goals then you will want to help me.

2 “The Platinum Rule” Treat others how they want to be treated

3 It’s all my Fault. If I am not getting the business I want or people are not passing me referrals. Or they pass me referrals that are not what I want –its all my fault .

When Michael Jackson sang of the “Man in the Mirror” I always think of number three. We need to remember that in referral marketing no one I has to help us just because we offer a good service or good product or even because we sign up or turn up and join groups such as BNI, BBG, ABC, Heels and Deals etc. I hear comments like “ BNI ( BBG, ABC etc) didn’t work for me, the people in this group are just the wrong industries, wrong mentality or wrong this wrong that!!”

I meet people who go to networking events and expect that people will be lining up to give them business or leave existing business contacts to immediately talk to them and start doing business.

The “networker or referral marketer” must realize that you have to invest in relationships before you can hope to seriously get real business (unless you are extremely lucky). If you are not getting the results you want from your networking group , Please before you blame others look at yourself in the mirror and ask:

1 Have I helped others enough. Do they feel obligated to help me through my proactive and unselfish actions.

 2 Do they know me well enough. Can I honestly expect that a 10minute conversation is sufficient for someone to suddenly start putting their reputation on the line and handing out their contacts. For that matter is 1 hour , 2hours even 3 hour. Think about it, if it were your car, would you lend it to them? Your reputation has to be worth more than a car because we spend a lifetime building it.

3 How do I present myself.

a. Do I arrive late repeatedly

b. Am I professionally dressed and by this I mean smart ( doesn’t have to be a suit depending on profession) but a tie (if worn) should be done up, shoes shone and shirts pressed.

c. Do I get involved in the running of the group and give back to the energy or do I sit back and let others do it all. Then blame them if it doesn’t work.

d. It amazes me that people can show up at networking events/ group meetings and honestly think that they can act poorly and unprofessionally and yet still believe that the group members will expect that the minute they get back to the office they miraculously become professional and competent.

Is it fair to say that we are always been interviewed and/or assessed. By new people and by people we already know. Michael Jackson said, that first you have to change the “Man in the Mirror “. Needless to say for the ladies out there I also refer in the “women in the mirror” .

When you look in the Networking Mirror who looks back at you?